
Rain delays, like this one at Coors Field in Denver, give fans a chance to let their minds wander. (AP)
If mice could pick up baseball bats
And wear those great big baseball hats
Could they be playing for the Cubs?
If not as starters, then as subs?
I wonder, too, if kangaroos,
If they were wearing baseball shoes,
Could help the Dodgers as they roam
And hop and bounce from third to home?
The Giants also might prevail
More often then they’d likely fail
If sometimes in the batter’s box
They could employ a quick, brown fox.
(Don’t say they shouldn’t do it ever.
Foxes, I am told, are clever.)
The Pirates, when they make a switch
And need somebody else to pitch,
Might find a monkey to replace
A tired or unhappy ace.
But could a chimp be taught to throw
A ball where it would have to go
To lead the ump to shout out, “Strike!”
Or shriek it, if she were a shrike.
I’d like to see in left a frog
They’d rescued from a swampy bog.
With luck a stork might find a place
At first or third or second base,
While someone playing in left field
Could someday be convinced to yield
His spot to some four-legged pup
Who’d chase the ball and chew it up.
This is the harmless game I play
To get me through a rain delay.
